Ikigai.

Dear Blog, Yesterday, I went to the Hebtsmesse (Swiss Carnival). I walked around with three other expats until the weather took a turn for the worst. It was pissing down rain and even as an Eugene girl, the rain can make a day go very sour. We ended up standing under an umbrella drinking cups of Gluhwein (pronounciation: Glue-Vine) (definition: warm red wine with spices). This was the first time that me and gluhwein met. At first it was so exciting and I couldn't stop drinking it's delicious flavours but then after a while it became hard to drink, and it made my head spin, and overall I felt sick. I walked around looking for a toilet which may have included me wandering around a cathedral. No such luck in that search but luckily, just walking around and not being around the Gluhwein fumes helped immensely. But let me talk about Ikigai. As I was drinking gluhwein and chatting with the other expats, Ikigai came up. One of the girls is a researcher in Psychology at the University of Basel. She talked about this study that was done about which groups of people live the longest and how those groups were similar in their way of life. One of the groups were Japanese and they lived by this philosophy of Ikigai. Your Ikigai is the reason why you wake up in the morning. It gives you meaning and purpose in life. Anyone who believes in Ikigai could tell you right away what they are living for. It made me think, could I do the same? This morning I was meandering through the year in accordance to my calendar. I used to be a busy a girl. A girl without a minute to spare. My reason to wake up in the morning was to learn and to become a teacher. A teacher that can transcend the love of learning to her students. But right now, I'm not a teacher. And I thought taking a gap year would be a nice breather and part of me still believes that it will be good for me in the long run. But right now, what is my Ikigai? I feel like graduating from college is tough for the identity. I need to figure out who I am without school.